Life Update: April 27, 2020

Man. This is a crazy world we are living in. When the new year rolled around, this is not what I was expecting from 2020. I know everyone is dealing with this in their own way, but I wanted to take a moment today to give everyone a life update for me.

I’m not sure how many of you know this, but I work two full time jobs and I am in school full time. Plus, I am always trying to get some words on the page. I also have two very needy fur-babies at home. It can be a lot to carry on a daily basis, but we all have to do what we have to do.

When the virus hit, a lot of people lost their jobs, while others were able to work from home. I, however, am considered an essential employee at both of my places of employment. So I am working 80 hours a week. My school was already an online program, so it continued without pause. And writing, well that has always been an at home project for me.

But I’m not letting this hectic schedule get me down. I know that I am lucky because I am still healthy and still working. I have been struggling to get the words in, but that’s honestly nothing new.

“A non-writing writer is a monster courting insanity”

― Franz Kafka

This quote is scarily accurate. Over the past year, I have had my world turned upside down more than once. I have worked my ass off to get my shit together. And honestly it was worth it. But in the chaos, I didn’t have the time, energy, or motivation to get any words on the page. The few times that I did sit down to try and write, I really struggled with understanding my characters and figuring out what needed to happen next. I would stare at the page for hours without typing a single word.

I started to go a little insane from it. I needed to write. I needed to let myself get lost in a story. But I couldn’t seem to let myself.

I’m still not sure what caused this, but over the past month, I have slowly started writing again. I am trying to keep the pressure off my writing and just let myself enjoy it, but we all know it’s not that simple. I want writing to be my career. I want my words out in the world for others to enjoy. That isn’t possible if I’m not actually writing.

So the way I am dealign with this is that I am allowing myself to work on whichever project calls to me each day. I have numerous projects in the works—my fairy wip, my letters wip, my summer wip, my 1920s wip, my mermaid wip, and my brand new five gods wip.

I know it would be easier to see my progress if I focused on one project, but I can’t seem to stay motivated when I try to do that. So I am hoping by allowing myself to choose which project to work on each day, I will be able to get words on the page without feeling stressed or overwhelmed.

I don’t know if this is going to work, but that’s the plan.

So that’s my life update. 2020 hasn’t been what I expected so far, but that’s okay. Why would we want life to go as expect. Plot twists are the best part of the story.

I hope all of my friends and followers on here stay safe and healthy through these difficult times. Remember to think of others during this trying time.



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